Star Trek: The Final Film Rankings

3. Star Trek: First Contact

            Like Wrath of Khan, this film relied on a pre-existing villain known to fans of Next Generation: the Borg. Also like Khan, the film succeeded by balancing action with explorations of its central characters. The opening space battle and the fight with the Borg during a spacewalk were both well executed. Picard must grapple with his guilt about his assimilation by the Borg and his almost blind desire to prevent their assimilation of his ship and Earth. Picard, already responsible for the death of thousands of Star Fleet officers, does not want to be responsible for the destruction of humanity as well. Data, meanwhile, struggles with his duties and loyalty to his friends as the Borg Queen offers him what he desires most of all: a chance to be human. Ultimately Picard offers to sacrifice himself to save Data, while Data rejects the offer of the Borg Queen and Earth is saved. 

2. Star Trek (Reboot)

            J.J. Abrams’ reboot of the Star Trek franchise understands the core relationships that defined Star Trek and employed them to create summer blockbusters. The cast largely embody the traits of their characters without falling into slavish impersonations. Chris Pine portrays Kirk’s brashness well. Zachary Quinto manages to demonstrate Spock’s relentless logic while also providing a window into his struggles with his own humanity. The film also plays with key themes from the previous films, but spins them in interesting ways, suggesting that no matter what changes in the timeline, these relationships and themes recur (a sort of BSG approach). By the end of the film, the characters are in place where they need to be for future films. Additionally Abrams never forgets to imbibe the film with a sense of humor and fun that attracted so many fans to Star Trek in the first place. Karl Urban’s McCoy and Simon Pegg’s Scotty carry much of the humor in the films and to great effect.

1. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan

            Wrath of Khan remains the best of all of the Star Trek films. Installing Khan as the villain gave the audience a preexisting and antagonistic relationship with the highest of stakes. The film features strong action and character moments. The battle in the nebula between the Enterprise and the Reliant still plays well as two technologically advanced ships have to rely on the skills of their captains in order to survive. Kirk and Spock’s philosophical discussion about the needs of the many and the needs of the few highlights the core of their respective characters. Kirk always acted in the manner he thought best, regardless of the rules, and refused to accept the inevitability of death. Spock measured his actions carefully with the broader situation and when the situation called for it; he sacrificed himself to save the rest of the crew. The film provided a strong blend of action and character moments that represented the best a Star Trek film could be.

Next time: The Real Hero of Ghostbusters. 

Star Trek Film Rankings Part III

6. Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home

            The Voyage Home completed the Enterprise’s journey back to Earth following Spock’s resurrection. But no journey home would be complete without time travelling back to the 1980s and hammering home, in classic Star Trek fashion, an overtly environmentalist message: Save the Whales! The notion that a giant black cigar would come to Earth after not hearing from whales for two hundred plus years is an incredibly stupid conceit. Yet some parts of the movie work remarkably well. Watching Kirk and Spock interact in the 1980s produces some very funny moments, including when Spock gives the Vulcan nerve pinch to a man playing his boom box too loudly on a public bus. Chekov asking for the location of the “nuclear whessels” remains amusing to this day. Even Dr. McCoy got in on the action by chewing out the antiquated medicine of the 1980s or as he called it the “Dark Ages.” The film manages to be preachy, but fun. 

5. Star Trek Into Darkness

            The second of J.J. Abrams’ Star Trek reboot serves as Star Trek Growing Pains. The film stresses the growth of Kirk, Spock, and crew into the characters of the Original Series. Kirk’s arrogance and innate belief in his own abilities come back to haunt him. He also learns that command means he must place the needs of others above his own. Spock attempts to shield himself from pain, while recognizing that sometimes one person can and must take action regardless of the consequences. Benedict Cumberbatch dazzles as this universe’s incarnation of Khan. His portrayal leads, at least initially, to see Khan as a more sympathetic figure, yet his megalomaniacal tendencies soon manifest themselves. Cumberbatch ably demonstrates both Khan’s superhuman strength and mental genius. 

4. Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country

            The final voyage of the Original Cast rebounded nicely from the debacle of the Final Frontier. The film, made at the end of the Cold War, pondered the cost of the overcoming the hatred and fear that defined the longstanding conflict between the Federation and the Klingons. With Spock instigating a reconciliation between the two sides, the film provides some nice character moments for Kirk as he must put aside his prejudices and accept Spock’s humane reaction to the Klingons’ plight (they are dying). Indeed many of the humans in the film advocate letting the Klingons’ die, while logical and calculating characters like Spock advocate the humane route by aiding them. The film presages the work of Deep Space Nine by questioning the high morals that the Star Trek franchise had set to embody. Uglying up the reputation of Star Fleet gave the franchise some much needed breathing room as its high minded moralism threatened to develop into merely lectures about contemporary soceity’s inability to overcome its own parochialism. Christopher Plummer delights as the Shakespeare quoting Klingon General Chang. 

Wild Bill Donovan & the Problem of the "Good Book"

Will Bill Donovan: The Spymaster Who Created the OSS and Modern American Espionage

By Douglas Waller

            In grad school seminars, students have a difficult time dealing with a “good book.” Whenever grad students use the phrase “it’s a good book,” they immediately follow with the word, “but”. Then they list everything that book should or could have done better. The discussion ultimately circles back and concludes with “it’s a good book.”

            Douglas Waller’s biography of William Donovan, who founded the Office of Strategic Services during World War II, exemplifies this quandary. Waller, a journalist who has covered politics, war, and espionage, exhibits passion and control over his material. His research draws from archives in the United States, the United Kingdom, Russia, Germany, and across the world. His descriptions of Donovan’s and the OSS’s activities during World War II constitute the bulk of the book and demonstrate the depth of his research. The book also offers a detailed early history of America’s first steps into the larger world of international espionage. As Waller demonstrates, bureaucratic infighting, untrained operatives, and unclear mandates from above beset the intelligence community from the start. He also shows how Donovan’s enthusiasm, his ability to inspire members of the OSS, and his relentless energy spearheaded America’s early intelligence gathering operation. As a history of American espionage in World War II, the book proves an interesting and enlightening read. OSS operations, for example, acquired Hitler’s dental records so the Russians could identify his body and the OSS provided much of the evidence for the Nuremburg Tribunal.  

            The book, however, fails as a biography of William “Wild Bill” Donovan. Waller breezes over much of Donovan’s life until the creation of the OSS. By page 57 of 389, Donovan is 57 years old.  In his life up to that point, Donovan had risen from a poor childhood in Buffalo to attend Columbia University, started a law practice in Buffalo, married into a wealthy family, entered Buffalo’s cultural elite, founded snooty private clubs, served as an officer in World War I where he earned medals for his valor, served as the U.S. Attorney for Buffalo, served as in the Justice Department as an assistant Attorney General, lost the race for the governorship of New York in 1932, and traveled around the world observing international affairs for the United States government in the 1930s. In doing so, Donovan largely neglected his wife and children, engaged in numerous affairs (which Waller does not detail), spent lavish sums of his wife’s money, and bounced from pet project to pet project with a boundless energy. Yet all of this serves as mere footnotes to Donovan’s OSS activity—the pesky life details that Waller had to address before reaching the meat of the project.

            While Waller deals with Donovan’s pre-OSS life in such a perfunctory manner, it seems to me that these activities served as important precursors to Donovan’s OSS activity. Waller, however, does not provide much detail into how Donovan gathered his information during his international forays. Yet Donovan would put these skills in action when he founded the OSS. They could have provided some insight into how Donovan created an international spying agency from scratch.  This absence epitomizes the problem with the book as biography, Waller fails to offer insight into Donovan’s character. The only bits of analysis of Donovan’s inner life seemingly enter the book accidently. Waller recounts how Robert Jackson, the chief prosecutor at the Nuremburg tribunal, “thought Donovan was a shallow, social climbing headline grabber” (347). At that point in the book, I was inclined to agree with Jackson’s assessment. Donovan had spent his marriage largely ignoring his wife Ruth and spending her money. He rarely spoke to his son David although David’s wife, Mary frequently served as Donovan’s hostess, sparking rumors of an affair. Yet Waller does not try to connect any of the events of Donovan’s life into his OSS career. He declines to discuss the potential influence that his social climbing, traveling, lavish spending, and familial neglect had on Donovan’s work in the OSS. After all, as Waller details, Donovan spent his time in the OSS attending every Allied landing he could find, traveling across the world establishing OSS stations, spending untold sums of government money, and not seeing his family for extended periods of time. Waller notes that Donovan “was not prone to introspection… (359).” Donovan’s lack of introspection is unsurprising, but it behooves his biographer to offer some.

          Wild Bill Donovan is a good book, but… 

The Fish that Ate the Whale

The Fish that Ate the Whale: The Life and Times of America’s Banana King

By Richard Cohen

In 1910, Sam “the Banana Man” Zemurray, head of Cuyamel Fruit Company, orchestrated a coup against the government of Honduran president Miguel Dávila. Zemurray provided guns, money, and a former US naval warship to former president Manuel Bonilla. The Cuyamel Fruit Company owned plantations in Honduras and shipped bananas to the United States on its own fleet of ships. Success in the volatile banana business relied on bribes and kickbacks to the Honduran government, keeping the cost of business low and the profit margins high. When the United States agreed to a treaty with President Dávila to administer Honduras’s staggering national debt, Zemurray’s business was in danger. With the J.P. Morgan Company’s agents assigned to Honduran customs houses collecting taxes on Cuyamel exports, Zemurray would be taxed out of business. Secretary of State Philander Knox warned Zemurray not to interfere in Honduras, but Zemurray proceeded with the coup anyway. When Bonilla came to power, he voided the deal with the U.S., protected Zemurray’s interests, and allowed Honduras’s crippling debt to continually plague the nation.  

Richard Cohen begins his lively biography of Zemurray with this anecdote highlighting the extent that Zemurray, an immigrant from present day Moldavia, would go to protect his business and his own interests. Cohen emphasizes how Zemurray’s meteoric rise from impoverished immigrant to the “Banana Man” embodies the equally inspiring and dispiriting nature of the American dream. Zemurray began his career by seizing upon the untapped potential in the banana market: ripe bananas. In the last quarter of the 19^th century, importers discarded ripe bananas because they would turn bad before they could reach distant markets. Zemurray bought up the ripe bananas, arranged a delivery deal with a local railroad, and made a fortune. Zemurray soon bought banana plantations, banana boats, and anything and everything related to the production of bananas. Making himself into a banana mogul required payoffs to local governments, buying land from natives on the cheap, and other morally ambiguous behaviors endemic to capitalistic enterprise In 1930, Zemurray sold Cuyamel to United Fruit Company. Several years later, Zemurray orchestrated another coup, this time to seize control of United Fruit. He saved it from the disastrous management that nearly ruined the company during the Great Depression. Zemurray succeeded in turning United Fruit around. In 1961, Zemurray died a rich man with a troubled legacy.

Cohen’s book has two great strengths. The first is the fascinating life story of Zemurray with his impoverished roots, his rise, and his moral compromises necessary to stay on top, and his later in life devotion to philanthropy. Second, Cohen’s energetic and sarcastic prose makes for an enjoyable read. The first sentence of the book sets the tone for the rest, “Sam Zemurray spoke with no accent, except when he swore, which was all the time” (3). At 242 pages, with some padding*, the book reads quickly. I finished it in a few hours of reading. Cohen also offers his own thoughts and insights into Zemurray’s life, recalling his own efforts to grow a banana in Connecticut, his attempts to imagine and understand the banana plantations of Central America, and a hilarious footnote about a New Orleans policeman refusing to take Cohen into the Iberville Projects, “’cause the sun is going down and I love my kids” (245). He also enlightens the reader on the emergence of the banana into the American marketplace in the late 19^th century and how the foreign fruit (Cohen argues that the banana is in fact a berry) became a quintessential staple of the American diet. He also provides insight into the different types of bananas and their unique features. In any specific type of banana, all of the bananas are clones of each other—making them uniform but also susceptible to disease.  Zemurray made his fortune importing the Big Mike banana, a type that died out in the 1960s. Today’s bananas are of the Cavendish variety and those will soon go extinct as well. The book takes a few diversions into the history of United Fruit’s activities in the 1950s and Zemurray fades into the background. This shift of focus leaves the responsibility that Zemurray had for the CIA’s or United Fruit’s activities in Central America in the 1950s unclear. He also makes several factual errors about the early history of the CIA that I was only aware of because I just read a biography of the founder of the Office of Strategic Services.**

Overall Cohen’s book succeeds as an entertaining and educating summer read.

*most notably skipping a whole page before starting a new chapter

** He incorrectly states that the OSS was not dissolved at the end of World War II. It was. The CIA was not created until 1947. Secondly he identifies Walter Bedell “Beetle” Smith and Allen Dulles as the 1^st and 2^nd Directors of Central Intelligence, they were the 4^th and 5^th.  

Star Trek Film Rankings Part II

9. Star Trek: The Motion Picture

            The first film featuring the Original Series cast suffered from a distinct lack of action spread out over  the longest of all the Star Trek films. The Enterprise approaches a mysterious object (one of the Voyager space probes) hurdling toward Earth for ten minutes of the movie. For a two hour film trying to incorporate in the Original Series characters, introduce new characters, and launch a movie franchise spending ten minutes just travelling towards a mysterious space cloud is a colossal waste of time. The costuming of the film is ridiculous to the point of distraction. The cast seems decked out in Star Fleet’s line of casual lounge wear. The two new characters (left over from the planned reboot of the TV series) feel artificially tacked on to the established dynamic of the Trek cast. Tellingly they are both written out of the film by the end—leaving the Original Series crew intact. 

8. Star Trek Generations

            The first film adventure for the Next Generation crew is a mixed bag. The film slogs along while the Enterprise searches for a mad scientist trying to get caught up in a magical energy ribbon. His ruthlessness and appetite for destroying solar systems prompts the Enterprise to intervene. Along the way, Picard enlists the help of Kirk, long since thought dead, but actually caught up in the energy ribbon. The film gives the original Enterprise a nice send off, featuring a warp core breach and a crash landing of the saucer section. The film fails in its treatment of Kirk’s death. Kirk and by extension the writers in charge of the Star Trek universe had always known that Kirk would die alone. He makes that explicitly clear in Final Frontier. The presence of Picard at Kirk’s death did not make it any more meaningful or purposeful. It did not seem to serve a clear purpose at all.

  

7. Star Trek III: The Search for Spock

            The Search for Spock struggled to balance the devotion of Kirk and the rest of the crew to Spock and incorporate other elements to the plot. The film begins well with Kirk and crew orchestrating the theft of the Enterprise to go and retrieve Spock’s body from the Genesis planet and reunite it with his consciousness (fittingly left in the brain of Dr. McCoy). The film drags with Christopher Lloyd’s Klingon villain. He appears out of nowhere and decides to kill Kirk and steal the Genesis device. Why? It’s never really made clear other than that he’s an evil Klingon. Most of the time spent on the Genesis planet seems to drag down the plot of the film. Even after retrieving Spock’s body and killing the villain the crew must still restore his soul. The film features the spectacular destruction of the original Enterprise, shown streaking across the sky of the Genesis planet, and the death of Kirk’s son David at the hands of the Klingons.

Star Trek Film Rankings Part 1

Ranking all twelve Star Trek films from worst to best.

12. Star Trek V: The Final Frontier

            God is an evil space alien who looks like Karl Marx and needs a spaceship to leave his prison in the middle of the Galaxy. That is the concluding act of this film. Along the way, Spock’s half brother brainwashes people by helping them confront and let go of their pain. Kirk, naturally refuses, arguing that he needs his pain. By the end of the film, Spock, McCoy, and Kirk agree that maybe there is no sentient creature known as God, but rather the spark of the divine lies in the hearts of mankind or alienkind or whatever. It is an overtly touchy-feely ending to a dreadful film. The less said about Uhura doing a seductive fan dance the better. 

11. Star Trek Insurrection

            The conflict of the film focused around Starfleet setting aside its principles to ensure its long term survival. The conceit, however, failed to develop into an interesting exploration of that idea. Instead Picard and the Enterprise, despite having the flagship of the Federation at their disposal, seem outmatched at every turn while helping the inhabitants of a small planet fight off evil aliens trying to steal their secret to everlasting life. Perhaps best exhibiting the problem of the film, the fate of Picard and his crew lies in Picard’s ability to guilt-trip an alien into helping him. Plot action through a stern lecture from Jean-Luc Picard hardly seems a successful way to advance a film. Also in the film, Picard falls in love, Data befriends a little boy, Worf gets pimples, and everyone on the Enterprise gets their groove back. 

10. Star Trek Nemesis

            The last film featuring the Next Generation cast returned unsuccessfully to the same themes of previous films: questioning the humanity of Jean-Luc Picard and further exploring Data's quest to become more human. The film shed a light on these issues by introducing clones; a Picard clone who rose to lead the Romulan Empire and Data must wrestle with a less technologically advanced version of himself. Picard's clone has murdered his way to the top, leading Picard, recognizing that he and the clone are the same person (but not really), to doubt his own goodness and humanity. This character turn, however, does not fit with a lifetime of actions up to that point. Picard always favored giving subordinates, friends, and enemies the opportunity to change and define themselves through their actions. Yet he refuses to apply those same rules to himself. While killing off Data tugged at the heartstrings of Trek fans, the presence of an identical Data whom Data had provided with all of his memories ensured that Data would live on in some form.